Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

All candy delivered from broom by witches. Kindly do not ask your delivery witch where the candy is stored. Under no circumstances order the gum.

Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

Hey kids, just let me reach into my giant bucket of wax shaped like corn, wax shaped like Indian corn, wax shaped like a pumpkin, or some wax shaped like a turkey left over from the last Thanksgiving. Happy Halloween!

Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

I'm exactly like the tooth fairy, except I come in the dead of night with my own pair of pliers!

Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

Sure, make your deadly anti-freeze ad look just like a candy ad for Halloween. That pumpkin isn't being cold, it's exhaling because it just narrowly avoided a lawsuit!

Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

Don't worry kids, I ate the witch! She tasted like chalk!

Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

Alternate take for Halloween 3: Season of the Witch.

Candy of Shame Halloween 2026

I'll give them credit for all the ways they package it, but I'm still not eating candy made primarily out of leaves.