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More Sexy Proibitissimo, wether you like it or not. Today our journey of historical stripping takes us to ancient Egypt, and based on this movie, it's the land of bad Liz Taylor imitators and Funkadelic back-up singers.
I hope that's milk!
Here we have the well known Cleopatra milk bath. For those wishing to duplicate it, the formula is:
- Roughly 82 metric tons of sand
Mix throughly, stick head end of an asp to your breast, die. Asp part mandatory.
What, no, what makes you think Katy Perry exploits other cultures?
History Geek-ing here for a second. One thing this segment shows is the actual multicultural make-up of the Egyptian Empire. I highly doubt the film makers meant to be so progressive, unless they meant progressively less clothes.
Also, History Hypocritical Geek-ing here for another second. The Asp/breast thing isn't historically proven.
Alright, back to the boobs!
I really, really hope that's milk!
That milk has got to be getting all up in the sorts of places milk was never meant to go. If she dances too hard she's going to have butter coming out her butt. Great, there's another couple of google hits right there from very surprised and very specific fetishists.
'Tis a fetching table cloth cape, my good knight!
The next segment is the courtly love in the Middle Ages, where women didn't shave and everybody smelled like dying cattle filled with dying plague flea infested rats -- so -- just like the Ren Fair! Ha! I really stuck it to the people who have literally been the butt of jokes for decades. That's the kind of high caliber comedy you'll get here, one step above open-mic night at the local country bar.
This segment is all about the newly married man finally getting a look at his bride. Will see represent the typical woman of Mediaeval times?
Blue cardboard brick, all the rage in the middle ages.
Oh course not.
You know, on second thought, I'm thinking the cities overflowing with sewage and the dead weren't so bad after all!