You think with my position as Cardinal Cesare Borgia I'd have a little more leeway with the ladies of the night. Is it the chestnut thing that scares them away? Look, I already said I'd do away with the various melons and stick with chestnuts! I've even put the ping pong balls away! How can we have a good male distance and quantity contest if no hookers sign up? Well, let's see what we have.
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